Before writing my wraps, I always read the previous year’s publication. 2020 sucked, didn’t it? As some of you may feel like 2021 flew by (for me, it’s like Groundhog Day), yet here we are. Another year gone and so much to be grateful for and reflect on. It’s amazing that a person can experience so much growth without breaking. What a year it’s been. It felt like standing still, but I know that I’m moving forward towards wishes and goals that I haven’t yet had the strength to make public.
2021 was a year of stillness. In the tarot, the Hanged Man depicts a man in blue and red clothing hanging from a tree by his ankle. When that card comes up for clients, they get scared. I ask them, “Does he look like he’s in danger? Or does he look uncomfortable?” They look closely at the card and find that the man looks more annoyed by his circumstances of being upside down than anything else. Then, upon further inspection, they find that the man has a halo around his head. “Enlightenment,” I say. The forced stop and shift in perspective allowed the man to view his life with fresh eyes. When it comes up for others, I tell them that now is a moment to rest and reevaluate, to be grateful for the pause in life. How often are we really given a chance to look at ourselves?
After the Hanged Man in the deck is Death. It seems disingenuous to tell clients that the Hanged Man is safe when Death follows his heels. In all honesty, it’s a relief to know that change must follow stasis. Things are not meant to stay still forever, even if it feels like we’ve spent a lifetime twisting in the wind.
For a long time, the Hanged Man was my least favorite card (it still is, but our relationship is changing) because I hate stillness. Staying still makes me feel like a failure. Why don’t I have more going on? Why aren’t I so busy that I’m sick? Blah, blah, blah. It sucks when it feels like a Hanged Man year. Even still, after reflecting on things that became over the last twelve months, I’m shocked to find so much.
This year, I:
- Wrote a novel about living in a communal household during a global pandemic
- Published a lot more than usual
- Got promoted
- Worked as a tarot reader in Salem all of October (574 readings, honey)
- Traveled (New York, New Orleans, Montreal)
- Dedicated writing time every Monday for four months
- Moved in with Richie and made a home
- Displayed Bug Eyes in an art show
- Developed spiritually
- Was officially diagnosed with ADHD (boy, does that make a lot of sense)
- Devoted a lot of time to creative accountability
- Took a class on creative promotion
- Introduced my mom and brother to my future family
- Enjoyed being engaged
- Read a book a week in an attempt to fall back in love with stories (to middling effect)
- Listened to the same ambient noise album 98 times
- Clarified my intentions about what I want out of life
So, in sum, it wasn’t a still year. Not really. There was a lot of growth and perspective-shifting, even if it didn’t feel like I was going anywhere fast. In a few weeks, I’ll be going back to my hometown for a few days, and that will tell me what I actually need to know about my growth. Things change without our noticing, and sometimes all we really need is a change in scenery.
Looking forward to 2022 as a year of powerful transformation.